We were living in Sacramento, CA and my husband had just accepted a job in Utah, where we were both born and raised and where we decided to return to be close to family.
A job with the State of California had originally brought us out to Sacramento 3 years earlier. I didn't want to go on this adventure of moving 600+ miles away from family because I was scared. But I have to admit that it felt right at the time. So we moved to California with two young children where I was able to be a full-time stay@home mom for the first time.
I am not a very out going person so I knew that getting to know new people would be a challenge for me. But what I found in Sacramento were some of the best friends that I have ever had in my life. I so desperately needed them and was so thankful for their acceptance, love and influence.
Today I found out that one of those friends is gone. Passed away suddenly, not sure what from.
My heart aches. My mind is questioning why. My eyes keep filling up with tears.
I had been thinking about her lately and was going to contact her, but I didn't. Now I won't get that chance, at least in this life. It is so easy now with fb and email to just send a little "thinking of you" note but I will regret not doing it now for the rest of my earth life.
It is so easy to switch positions with her in my mind but it is imaginably hard to comprehend how her husband and kids are coping. I don't want to think of her as gone, I would much rather imagine her playing or teaching her four young kids, or tending to her amazing garden or sitting down and reading a good book, or talking with me at Friday club, or during the early morning walks we used to take together.
Her friendship meant so much to me. I wish I had done a better job of telling her so. Love you Kendra-I know someday I will see you again! May God bless and watch over your family.
